After a few months of blogging, someone suggested to me that I try wordpress.com so that's what I am going to do. This will still be here as my older blog posts are all here...however for future posts please go to:
A GIRL NAMED JOCELYN BLOG
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Sunday, October 18, 2009
My life....
...it's sometimes a little crazy! The last couple of weeks, since I was sick, have been GO GO GO! Things never really seem to slow down. I've been meaning to update things here for the last couple of weeks...but just haven't had time. So here's a quick update on some stuff:
1. Dating - I said a few weeks ago that I was done with dating for the next 6 months. Initially it was a reaction to things going on in my life...and so it was a blanket statement. And in many ways it still is. However, in the course of the last few weeks since making that decision I have made some modifications. See before I made that decision I was struggling with being okay with being alone, with not having someone in my life beyond my kids. And so I figured that the only way to get okay with that was to immerse myself in it. But then I got to thinking - I talk alot about balance, about keeping things in proper perspective and this all-or-nothing stance I was taking wasn't necessarily balanced. So what I decided was this. I won't be initiating anything with anyone. But if someone else did, that would be different. And so that's where I stand on that! :)
2. Being alone - being alone has always been hard for me. Quiet, or too much of it, was always unsettling. In the last few weeks I have been embracing being alone...learning to enjoy those quiet moments like I never have before. Not always having the TV on for background noise. Or even music for that matter. For the first time in years I sit in my office sometimes for hours at a time with nothing but the sound of my fingers on the keyboard...and it's becoming more comfortable. Don't get me wrong, my prefered work environment still consists of music and human interaction in small doses, but I am finally able to accomplish just as much during a day without any of that as I am with it. I know for some people that is mind-boggling - they require quiet and no interruptions to be at their peak in terms of performance. I have been the opposite in days gone by. However, it's becoming an area in which FINALLY I am far more balanced than I used to be! :) I'd go so far as to say that I have almost achieved a really great mix of the two. Both at home and at the office. It feels good.
3. Taking risks/leaving comfort zones - I am a cautious risk taker. I never used to go to new places or events unless I was accompanied by a friend, or at the very least knew one or two other people. I've started to do more of that...stepping out and going where I wouldn't have before. I'm also considering doing things I would never have before. I'm taking chances, stepping out. Learning to live once again. The shackles of fear that used to be on me have loosened and while I am not going to go crazy and take all kinds of unnecssary risks, I am not going to allow fear to stop me from experiencing good things anymore. From developing new friendships, learning new sports or activities, giving of myself. And ya know, I've always been somewhat confident but I'm growing in that by leaps and bounds these days...and I love it! :)
Okay...that's enough of an update. There is more I could talk about - how I have been working on writing down the fundamental things I want in my life, the things I want to experience. How in defining those things that I want, I am also defining who I am and what my purpose is. I could write about the challenges i have been facing lately in terms of parenting and the changes I am seeing in myself and my kids. I could write about anger and forgiveness and grace. But it's late. I'm tired. And I need something to talk about tomorrow!
1. Dating - I said a few weeks ago that I was done with dating for the next 6 months. Initially it was a reaction to things going on in my life...and so it was a blanket statement. And in many ways it still is. However, in the course of the last few weeks since making that decision I have made some modifications. See before I made that decision I was struggling with being okay with being alone, with not having someone in my life beyond my kids. And so I figured that the only way to get okay with that was to immerse myself in it. But then I got to thinking - I talk alot about balance, about keeping things in proper perspective and this all-or-nothing stance I was taking wasn't necessarily balanced. So what I decided was this. I won't be initiating anything with anyone. But if someone else did, that would be different. And so that's where I stand on that! :)
2. Being alone - being alone has always been hard for me. Quiet, or too much of it, was always unsettling. In the last few weeks I have been embracing being alone...learning to enjoy those quiet moments like I never have before. Not always having the TV on for background noise. Or even music for that matter. For the first time in years I sit in my office sometimes for hours at a time with nothing but the sound of my fingers on the keyboard...and it's becoming more comfortable. Don't get me wrong, my prefered work environment still consists of music and human interaction in small doses, but I am finally able to accomplish just as much during a day without any of that as I am with it. I know for some people that is mind-boggling - they require quiet and no interruptions to be at their peak in terms of performance. I have been the opposite in days gone by. However, it's becoming an area in which FINALLY I am far more balanced than I used to be! :) I'd go so far as to say that I have almost achieved a really great mix of the two. Both at home and at the office. It feels good.
3. Taking risks/leaving comfort zones - I am a cautious risk taker. I never used to go to new places or events unless I was accompanied by a friend, or at the very least knew one or two other people. I've started to do more of that...stepping out and going where I wouldn't have before. I'm also considering doing things I would never have before. I'm taking chances, stepping out. Learning to live once again. The shackles of fear that used to be on me have loosened and while I am not going to go crazy and take all kinds of unnecssary risks, I am not going to allow fear to stop me from experiencing good things anymore. From developing new friendships, learning new sports or activities, giving of myself. And ya know, I've always been somewhat confident but I'm growing in that by leaps and bounds these days...and I love it! :)
Okay...that's enough of an update. There is more I could talk about - how I have been working on writing down the fundamental things I want in my life, the things I want to experience. How in defining those things that I want, I am also defining who I am and what my purpose is. I could write about the challenges i have been facing lately in terms of parenting and the changes I am seeing in myself and my kids. I could write about anger and forgiveness and grace. But it's late. I'm tired. And I need something to talk about tomorrow!
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